On the Leesh

The Sexually Dylan Julian Johnnie Juice

EVELYN HARDEN (known to the band as “Evil-in”) helped coin the phrase super-lawyer; she doesn’t get out of bed for less than ten thousand dollars an hour. A shark among sharks, she navigates easily through all aspects of the entertainment industry. It is said that allegiance with Evelyn is better than having actual talent. Just ask Paris Hilton, Sofia Coppola, and Tom Cruise’s current wife, all of who were one-time clients of Ms. Harden. Her true motives behind resurrecting Juice and The SEXually is yet to be known. Industry insiders joke, “It’s her bet with the Devil.” To which she is rumored to have replied, “Not so much a bet, as it is a favor. He owes me one.”

JANE: little is known about this Harvard grad, except that she is rarely seen more than twenty feet away from Ms. Harden. Jane is Evelyn’s Google, her right hand, second brain, food taster, boot licker, and often fills in as her executioner. Jane’s favorite guilty pleasure is berating her peers on Evelyn’s behalf.

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